Category Archives: Education

Rights for Illegals?

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Recently our local news featured a story about a certain legislation that has come under scrutiny again.  As with anything to do with immigration, it came under fire from different sectors of the community.

The bill in question is aimed at ensuring that illegals who are attending state owned universities continue to pay in state tuition if they’ve attended high school in the state for a minimum of three years.

Now, I have mixed feelings about this whole issue of illegal immigration.  I’ve read enough and seen enough to know the horrendous conditions that are found in places where a lot of illegal immigrants come from.  It is absolutely heartbreaking to see how some people in this world live.  It is hard to see stories of children having to spend their days in a landfill to find food.  It is painful to see the desperation on a mother’s face because she has no idea how she’ll feed her family.  It’s no wonder that so many desperate people risk their lives and freedom to come to this country illegally. 

Is illegal immigration justified?  Are they really taking jobs away from citizens and other lawful residents? 

As I stated earlier, I find myself conflicted about this issue. 

The one argument that I really don’t want to hear, however, is that illegals should be allowed to stay because deporting them would cause harm to the family, i.e. families shouldn’t be separated.  One of the supporters interviewed on the news actually stated that it wouldn’t be right to deport them as that puts a stress on families due to being apart or separated (I’m paraphrasing of course). 

The young man has good intentions but he needs to think hard before he speaks on this issue.  Perhaps, he needs to get to know a few more people and hear their stories.  Here’s one for example.  My family lives in three different countries, not because we want to, but because we’re trying to do things legally.   Most of us are here in this country and have become US citizens.  We love our adopted country and are all contributing to our communities in a lot of different ways.  However, three of our siblings still live outside of this country because their paperwork to move here legally is still stuck in the backlog that is the US immigration system.  They’ve been waiting for 8 years and they’ll probably be waiting for quite a while longer.  We know of many families in this situation.  Some have been waiting for well over 10 years.  Some of our military friends have families from different parts of the world, and they report a similar scenario as well.  It’s hard, and it’s frustrating, and yes, we would rather have everyone here so that our family can enjoy being together, but we didn’t want them to come here illegally so we’re living with the consequences of trying to do things the right way.   

So please don’t tell me that you support illegal immigration or any rights or legislation associated with that issue because you don’t want to break families up etc.  Tell me that you support illegal immigration because to send them back to wherever they come from would be inhumane.  I can totally see that argument having some validity but don’t tell me that it would break up their family.  If families in situations like mine have to sacrifice being together as a family , then a family that is here illegally has no right whatsoever to use that as an argument to stay here or to get the fringe benefits that come with being a lawful resident or citizen.

As far as giving illegals the fringe benefits of state tuition, I’m totally against it.   This isn’t fair to the taxpayers of this state, or to every other citizen of this country.  Why should illegals get this break?  A citizen of the United States from another state has to pay out of state tuition, but an illegal student can pay in-state tuition just because they’ve been here illegally for at least three years?  Am I missing something here? 

Supporters of this bill also argue that these students shouldn’t be punished because of something their parents did, (i.e.  came here illegally).  They also argue that these students are bona fide residents of the state because they’ve grown up here and lived here all of their lives, that they pay taxes.   Well, paying taxes is the least they should do.  They should pay taxes for the privilege of having a job here in America, of working here illegally and making more than they would make if they were working in their countries.   They are already reimbursed for their taxes by the fact that they have better living conditions etc than they would have if they were back where they should be.  They drive the same roads that we all drive on, don’t they?

As for the argument that they shouldn’t be punished because it was their parents that brought them here, that it isn’t their fault, well guess what, that’s called life.  My kids didn’t ask to be in a military life.   We, their parents, made that choice and like it or not, they have to put up with the conditions that come with the kind of life that we chose, conditions such as move every two years, start at a new school, make new friends, deployments, etc.  It sucks for them, it sucks a lot.  But that’s the card they’re dealt with because as their parents, we chose this life for our family.   Good or bad, our kids have to deal with whatever problems come with the choice that we made.  Why should it be any different for children of illegals? 

If this kind of legislation is going to be law all over the country, I guess I’ll just have to call all my relatives in various parts of the world and tell them to come on over, I’ll tell them not to worry about going through the proper channels, that if they wait long enough and live here illegally long enough, their kids will have all the rights and privileges that legal residents and citizens do.  I’ll tell them that filing petions and applications to come here legally is just for suckers who don’t know any better.  Why wait 10, 15, or 20 years when you can come here right now?  Why would anyone in their right mind want to immigrate here legally when there are suckers who propose and pass legislation that reward illegals?  Think that doesn’t happen?  You’d better believe it does. 

Anyone hear the story about the camel, the camel’s owner, and the sandstorm?  If you haven’t, it’s a story you need to read because there are striking parallels to what’s going on here!

If we want to reward someone, let’s reward the thousands who are waiting to come to this country legally.  Let’s reward the families who have been separated from loved ones for years due to a backlog in immigration by pushing their petitions through immediately and granting them legal residency.  To reward families who are here illegally is a slap in the face to every immigrant that has come here legally and to every worthy applicant that is waiting patiently for his or her chance to immigrate legally to this country.

Now, I support medical care for illegals because I believe that medical care shouldn’t be withheld from anyone regardless of their citizenship or ability to pay. I also don’t have too much of a problem with the fact that they’re already getting a quality free education at the elementary and high school level alongside other lawful residents and citizens of this country.   But to spend my tax dollars to help offset an illegal person’s tuition at our state universities and colleges?  Absolutely not!!!

From what I hear, quite a few of our Samoan people are here illegally as well.  There’s probably just as many Samoans in this situation in other countries as well, New Zealand, Australia, etc.  It sounds as if there’s a lot of not-so-above-board things going on.  All I have to say is afai e iai seise o maua i lea kulaga, ia kaumafai e su’e se mea e maua ai lau green card.  E leaga le gofo i Amelika ae popole pe o a fea e maua ai oe.

Confessions of a 40-something Samoan woman

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I was getting my daily dose of political news today on cnn.com when I saw a  link to this article,  Confessions of a 40-something woman.  Being a 40-something woman myself, it immediately caught my attention and of course I just had to read it.   Boy am I glad I did.  I loved it.  Kudos to Lisa Kogan for such a hilarious and amazingly honest portrayal.  You’ve got to read the whole article, but here is a little teaser to get you going.

 I know that it’s human nature to want to glorify the past and preserve it in a delicious, if often inaccurate, cotton-candied haze. But the truth is that part of me (that would be the part of me that now needs an underwire bra and a pair of Spanx) really does miss my 20s. I still had that new car smell. I still thought terrorism would stay confined to the other side of the world. ….As much as I miss those days, I’m delighted and relieved to be done with being young.  One quick glance in the mirror is all I need to know that time is most definitely a thief. Wait, strike that: One glance and I usually think I’m holding up pretty well — it’s upon closer inspection, that moment when I take a deep breath, put on my glasses, and turn up the dimmer switch, that I’m reminded gravity is not my friend. But if time has robbed me of a little elasticity and a lot of naïveté, it’s left a few things in their place.”

Lisa Kogan, you made me laugh so you are my favorite person today.  I loved your article so much I decided to borrow your idea (as well as the title of your piece) so I hope you’ll forgive me for such blatant thievery. 

Do I miss being young?  Sometimes, some days.  Mostly it’s those days when I realize that I’ll probably never fit into those super skinny jeans again, (the ones that I’ve got tucked away in the farthest corner of the closet, just in case).  Or when I stare much too long in the mirror and notice the wrinkles on my forehead and the age spots around my eyes.  So yes, sometimes, some days, just a little bit, and just for the briefest of seconds, and then I wake up and realize that being a 40-something woman isn’t bad at all.  In fact, it’s absolutely great!

 Who wants to be “young and clueless” again? Not me, thank you very much. 

Sure the body isn’t so firm, sure the “girls” aren’t as perky, sure there’s a few more gray hair showing every day, but hey what is that compared to the abundance of gifts that I have as a 40-something woman?  What are these gifts you ask?  For starters, how about self-confidence, how about life lessons learned from overcoming, from achieving, and from being a mother.  How about really knowing who I am, and not letting others tell me who, what, where, when, and why.  Finally, how about a sense of security that comes from a certain level of success and maturity, and from knowing that despite your flawed 40-something body, you are loved?  Would I trade all that to be a 20-something again?  Absolutely not.  Being young is way overrated!

Lisa Kogan concludes her article with lessons she’s learned and continues to learn as a 40-something woman.  Since I’m shamelessly copying her idea, why not go all the way –  so here’s my list of what I’ve learned as a 40-something Samoan woman.

  • Don’t turn the other cheek.  You’ll only end up with two fat cheeks.  If someone disrespects you, don’t let it go, say something.  You don’t have to fuki slam them, but you do have to make it clear that you won’t stand for that kind of treatment.
  • Just say No.  It’s ok to give to fa’alavelaves when you can spare the dough, but if you don’t have it, just say No.  If its for someone that you’d never even heard of, or if its the third cousin of a third cousin’s third wife, just say, “heck no!”
  • Don’t just be an opinionated woman, be an educated opinionated woman.  So you think you’re smart?  Then back it up, be informed.  Being educated doesn’t just mean a formal education although if you the opportunity to go to college by all means do so.  If not, you can educate yourself on the issues, on current events, on the history of Samoa and Samoans, and anything you’re interested in.
  • If life throws you a lemon, cut it up and rub it on your elbows and knees.   Hard times can sometimes be a blessing in disguise so stop feeling sorry for yourself and find the silver lining in your challenges.
  • It’s the journey and the destination.  Both are important, not one over the other.  It matters how we get there and it matters what we do when and if we get there.   Learn all you can from the journey and don’t forget those lessons once you reach the destination.
  • It’s what you think that matters.  Stop worrying so much about what others think about you, your kids, your life.  Who cares what they think?
  • Your mother isn’t always right.  Sure we respect and love our parents, but they aren’t always right.  One of the signs of maturity and being your own person is recognizing that our parents are fallible, that they make mistakes, and that their opinions, biases, and judgments are just that – their opinions, biases, and judgements.  Just because your mother hates Sina doesn’t mean that you have to hate Sina.  Be your own person, think for yourself.
  • Life really isn’t fair.  Sure we’d all like to have a million dollars tucked away somewhere.  Yes, we’d all to look like _____ (fill in the blank) but that’s not going to happen.   And of course, we all wish our lives were just perfect.  But that ain’t happening any day soon, so deal with it.  You’ve got what you’ve got, work with it.  Find what it is you’re meant to do and go for it. 
  • It’s good to take pride in your family name, but it’s better to take pride in your own name.  Sure we’re all proud to be descendants of chiefs but what else have you accomplished, what have you done, what have you earned?  Is your one claim to fame the fact that you’re related to so and so?

Excuse Me, but Your Ignorance Is Showing

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So my usually easy-going son comes home in a huff today from his last class at the university.  Gives me a peck on the cheek and then pulls out a textbook and says, “Mom, what do you think of this?”

He begins to read it to me (I’m including the article here so you too can judge for yourself):  Here goes…

“You’ve been invited to a community awards ceremony at a local church of Pacific Island immigrants that is to honor students from your school. You gladly accept, arrive a few minutes early, and are ushered to a seat of honor on the stage.  After an uncomfortable (to you) wait of over an hour, the ceremony begins, and the students proudly file to the stage to receive their awards.”

I’m about to tell my son that this disregard for punctuality is one of those things that I find absolutely infuriating, that as far as I’m concerned, operating on so called “Samoan-time” is just downright rude and shows no class whatsoever, etc etc.  But apparently that isn’t the offending paragraph.  So I hold my tongue while my son continues reading.

“…The children all go back and sit down in the audience again, and the meeting continues with several more items on the agenda.  The kids are fine for a while, but get bored and start to fidget.  Fidgeting and whispering turn into poking, prodding, and open chatting.  You become a little anxious at the disruption, but none of the other adults appear to even notice, so you ignore it too.  Soon several of the children are up and out of their seats, strolling about the back and sides of the auditorium.  All adult faces continue looking serenely up at the speaker on the stage. Then the kids start playing tag, running circles around the seating area, and yelling gleefully. No adult response-you are amazed, and struggle to resist the urge to quiet the children.  Then some of the kids get up onto the stage, run around the speaker, flick the lights on and off, and open and close the curtain! Still nothing from Islander parents who seem either unaware or unconcerned about the children’s behavior!  You are caught in the middle of a conflict of cultures-yours and the Pacific Islanders’…What do you do in this situation?”

Well, I immediately see why my son had smoke coming out of his ears, I too was now practically foaming at the mouth!  But I’ll get to my reaction in a little bit. 

Back to my son – he goes on to tell me that he felt so angry as he was listening to this being read in class.  He was about to say something when behind him, he heard a girl say in response to the question, “Well, obviously I’m going to go talk to the parents because apparently they don’t know how to raise their kids right.”  (Dang, I wish I’d been in that class during that discussion).  Ok, ok, back to my son.

He turned around and said, “Excuse me, you have no idea what you’re talking about.  I’m Samoan, and I can tell you that there isn’t a Samoan parent, or another Pacific Islander parent that would let their child behave in such a manner.   I can tell you that my parents raised me to be respectful and to behave and I can also tell you that knowing what I know of Pacific Islanders because I am one, there is no Pacific Islander parent under the face of the sun that would tolerate these kinds of behaviors from their kids.  If anything, that kind of behavior would have been nipped immediately either by the parent giving them “the look” or even a smack right then and there if they don’t get the message.”

Of course I was glad he spoke up, and oh how my hands itched to smack that stupid stupid girl.  The nerve, the absolute gall, the total ignorance of some people completely amazes me!

We talked for a little while longer.  I told my son that I completely agree with what he said in class.  We don’t let our kids get out of hand, if anything we err too much the other way.  I can’t picture a Samoan or Pacific Islander parent that lets their kid behave like a hooligan during such an event.  It’s not Samoan kids or Pacific Islander kids that throw tantrums and fits, it’s not Pacific Islander kids that tell their parents to “shut, the f*** up.  It’s not Pacific Islander parents that let their children walk all over them.  It’s not Pacific Islander parents that let their children do as they please.  No sirreeee!

By the way, according to the references in the text, the above excerpt was adapted from Winitzky, 1994 who states that the invitation and the events (described above) actually happened to one educator.

Since my son has already given this clueless girl a piece of his mind, I’ll direct this towards Winitzky.  Winitzky, your scenario is crap.  Check your sources because there is no way that a Pacific Islander parent would fail to act in the kind of situation you described.  No Pacific Islander parent would continue to just sit back “looking serenely up at the speaker on the stage” while their children are wreaking havoc during an important ceremony.  Unlike some cultures, Pacific Islanders do know what it means to have respect.  We come out of the womb breathing respect, for crying out loud.  A conflict of cultures?  That’s a good one.  I guess the western culture (for lack of a better term) is known for respect and decorum.  Now that I think about it, why respect is the first thing that comes to mind when I think of western culture, NOT!  What a joke!  Something is not right in this picture, and one of you (you or your source) isn’t telling the whole story.  The only thing that this excerpt show is an ignorance on your part to the true essence of Pacific Islander culture.  If you are going to write about another culture, please make sure you really do understand it first.  And you call yourself an educator? Shame, shame, shame on you!

Samoan-American

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Undoubtedly, many of our kids who are born and raised outside of Samoa face a real dilemma. 

On the one hand, they have it easy.  Real easy in a lot of ways. After all, Samoan kids growing up in America (like mine for example) enjoy the kind of life that those who are growing up in Samoa can only dream of.  Many of our kids have no clue about the hardships that the kids in Samoa face, that we faced when we were growing up.  Some would say that our American born kids have it made and in a lot of ways, that sentiment would be absolutely correct.

Yet, in many other ways, they also have it a lot harder than those of us who grew up or are growing up in Samoa.  Our kids are expected to walk a fine line between who they are as Americans and who we expect them to be as Samoans.  Those of us who grew up in Samoa  never had to face such a dilemma.  Samoa and Samoan culture was all we knew so we weren’t torn between two conflcting and competing cultures. 

Speaking as a parent, I expect my sons to take pride in the fact that they are Americans.  Because they are Americans, I expect them to contribute to their community and to their country, to be grateful that they are citizens of this great country.  I also expect them to take advantage of every opportunity that is here for them.   I tell them that there is no reason why they can’t be whatever it is that they dream of becoming when they grow up.  I fully believe that as their mother and I think I’ve drilled that into them enough times for them to believe it too.  This dream, the American dream, is one of the best things about America and one of the things that I love about it the most.

However, I also expect my sons to not be so American that they forget that they are also Samoan.  I expect them to embrace and rejoice in the fact that they are citizens of this great country but I also expect them to remember and live their Samoan culture.  Is this practical?  Is it asking too much?  I suppose what I really want is for my sons to take the best from both.  This sounds so easy to me but I know that to a teenager, that fine line isn’t always so obvious, it isn’t so apparent in their minds. 

I think that sometimes this identity struggle is a lot harder on our youth than we imagine.  Perhaps, this struggle and the confusion that comes with it is one of the reasons why some of our youth make the poor choices that they make.  They see and hear one thing at home yet the world outside as they know it is completely different.  How can we as parents, as a Samoan community help them?

Home-schooling

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I really should tell you why I haven’t been writing on this blog so much.  After Christmas we decided to pull our boys out of the school they were attending and homeschool them.  We’ve been talking about it for a few months, and we finally decided now was the right time for it.  

Homeschooling was really not our first option, in fact, we didn’t even consider it until several months ago.   However, this move has proven to a very challenging one for our boys, especially our teenager.   He had a hard time fitting in with the established cliques and groups that make up the high school world.  He wasn’t happy and it was affecting his school work.  To make matters worse, we just couldn’t work with a couple of his teachers.  As a former school teacher with many years of teaching experience in Utah, Hawaii, American Samoa, and Samoa, I have a pretty good grasp of what goes on in a school setting and the ins and outs of this profession so I was pretty disgusted with the attitude we encountered.  

Anyway, we decided that the best course of action right now is to homeschool our boys.  It’s been going really well and we are enjoying it.  I do miss having the day to myself to complete errands, housework, and write.  However, the additional time with my boys is definitely a wonderful thing.   The laundry may pile up faster, the writing on my blogs may be sporadic for now, and my third grader says that I’m too strict as a teacher because I make him go over all his mistakes to figure out why he got them wrong, but other than that it’s going really well.

I’ve always been a huge supporter of traditional schooling but this experience is opening my eyes to other alternatives for education.   Today, with technology and the tools that are available to us, there really are a lot of options.   This is actually an exciting possibility for those who live in Samoa and many other places in the world who are looking to enhance the education they’re receiving there.  A number of accredited online high schools are available today and anyone in the world with internet access can enroll in those schools.  Keystone High School http://www.keystonehighschool.com/ appears to be an excellent one, at least from everything that I’ve read about it. 

I still prefer traditional schooling, in fact, we plan on our boys going back to “regular” school next year when we move back.  However, there is definitely a place for homeschooling in this country.  People homeschool for a variety of reasons, in our case, it’s because the schools in our area wasn’t a good fit for our boys.  What makes this whole situation really ironic, is the fact that we chose to live where we’re living because it’s supposed to be the best school district in the county.   That meant higher property values, taxes and all that.  We could have lived even closer to hubby’s work and paid a lot less for a home in that area.   Oh well, live and learn!

Pride and Acceptance

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Yes, the whole question of white vs. black (and all other shades in between) is still alive and well. Do I experience it? Absolutely! Maybe not every day but enough so that it’s something that you need to deal with. Its enough of a concern so that when we found out where we were moving I emailed some contacts and friends (from graduate school days) I had in the area and asked about the diversity of the city. My high schooler and I went to the open house at his school just before school started and the first thing he noticed was that he was the only brown kid there. Not technically true, since I’ve seen one other brown kid there but you get the picture.

So how do I deal with it? By acknowledging that it does exist, accepting it, and dealing with it as it comes up. Sometimes I think I deal with it well, sometimes I totally lose my cool, but most times I think I handle it okay. Of course, like every other parent, I’m sure we all wish that our kids didn’t have to deal with this garbage but unfortunately our country is a long long way from there. So we deal with it as best we can – we teach our kids to be proud of who they are, that they come from a noble heritage, that they are every bit as smart and capable as the next kid whatever color they are. I also tell them that if they ever come across it, say a kid that thinks they are better than them to not waste their time with them because they do not deserve their time and friendship.

Will we ever get to the point where we are really and truly color blind? I doubt it at least not in my lifetime – what a pity! Why am I bringing this up now? Because I sometimes just get really fed up with narrow minded people who think that just because they are a certain color they are better and more deserving than someone else. O taimi fa’apea e vave lava le oso mai ole tiapolo. Ia ae ku’u ai pea ia, lava pea le onosa’i aua e maimau lava le kaimi i vale fa’apea, aea. Well, I really don’t want to generalize as its not everyone but that 20% who feel that way and look down their noses at others because they are different is a large enough number to bother me a whole lot.

To be completely honest and fair we do it too, don’t we?  People from Tutuila have their snide remarks about people from the “moku” and then people from Upolu think that they are better than their cousins from Savaii.  Yeah, we may think its all in good fun,  we’re just joking around, but are we really?  Deep down, don’t we feel just a little superior just because we happened to be born somewhere?  Aren’t we secretly glad that we weren’t born there?  Is that our one claim to fame?  Where we were born?  If that is the case I feel sorry for you sister or you brother.  If you’re going to feel that you are better than someone else, at least feel that way because of something that you have accomplished, something that you’ve earned.  You had nothing at all to do with where you were born, just the luck of the draw.  Oh, and the thing that really makes me laugh is that the people who make fun of their fellow Samoans from the “moku” or from “Savaii” have at least a parent or a grandparent from that island.  Isn’t that a hoot? 

Didn’t someone write a song about this?  Tiama’a, Malia and Alapati? It was an old time Samoan group but I can’t think of the name right now.   Anyway, why can’t we all just get along (ha, ha).  Now I sound like a cheap commerical.  Perhaps, there is no hope for our generation, but we can teach our kids.   We can do what we can so that the next generation can do a better job of accepting people instead of judging them based on color, birth country, or anything else.

Notable Samoan Women

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I came across a speech by Winnie Laban recently that really impressed me. I hadn’t heard of her before but she is definitely an important woman in New Zealand politics. And she is Samoan. Obviously, she is intelligent and articulate. What an awesome role model for our young Samoan daughters. I’m including the link to her speech here because I think everyone should read it in its entirety. http://www.winnie.org.nz/speeches/speech_at_unifem_womens_conferen

One of the points she raised in her speech is that sometimes if we want to accomplish something we have to have a thick skin. How true! Unfortunately, too often people want to limit what we can do. They may do this in subtle ways but it is there. I’ve seen this even from some of our Samoan people. Sometimes it is our own people that is our worst enemy. Instead of being happy that a fellow Samoan is doing well, and thus, bringing pride and recognition to our Samoan community, they appear to do and say things that belittle such accomplishments. Sometimes, I’ve even heard other Samoans refer to those Samoans who do well as fia palagi.

Probably such people imagine that only a palagi can have a brain, that only a palagi can have an opinion, that only a palagi can be successful, that only a palagi can have a prestigious career and status in today’s society. How utterly sad. As a community, we Samoans have enough barriers that we must all deal with without adding to it ourselves. I wonder if someone in Winnie Laban’s life told her that she could never become a Member of Parliament in New Zealand because she is Samoan? If so, I’m so glad she never listened to them.

I agree with Ms. Laban that we need more Samoan women in positions of power and authority, not only in our beloved Samoas but wherever else we call Home today. We need to have more of our Samoan women making the decisions that count.

Samoans are wonderfully gifted. Yes, we’re good at sports, that is an awesome talent in and of itself. But we are also intelligent and talented at many other things. We have so many young people with the potential to make it big in sports. Unfortunately, many do not make it all the way because of grades. Many an aspiring Samoan athlete finds out the hard way that grades are just as important if they are going to the attention they want from most colleges.

We are not all going to get the well deserved fame and public respect that Winnie Laban has. We are not all going to get the kind of attention she commands when she speaks. But all of us, Samoan women, all of us who are mothers can be notable in our families through the way we raise our kids. We can all be notable if we teach our kids that there is no limit to what they can do. We can all be notable if we raise a young Samoan generation that refuses to settle for second best. We can all be notable if we raise a generation of Samoans who believe that they too can go to the best colleges, have well-paying jobs, and make positive contributions to their communities. We can all be notable by becoming role models for our children by ‘doing’ and not just preaching!

Teach our Children

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I don’t know about you but once in awhile I do a search online for any noteworthy mention of Samoa and/or Samoans.   I like to read about how well Samoans are doing in their field, whatever that may be.  I feel a surge of pride in our Samoan people when I read about any Samoan who has accomplished alot in whatever they’re doing.   When I read about our young people who are doing well I feel like sending a huge shoutout and a fa’amalo to them and their families.  It doesn’t matter to me whose daughter or son it is, if they are Samoan I feel a pride in them as if they were my own. 

As a Samoan community we need to be known more for the good things that we do rather than the bad.   Too often we are in the public eye for stupid things that some of our Samoan people might do.  Too often a Samoan is in the news for something really bad.   When such things happen I feel really sad because I know that its another blow to our image as a Samoan people that we really didn’t need.  Of course we all know that our people do a lot more good than bad, that many more of our Samoan people serve their communities proudly and tirelessly but it seems as if the media is there only when one of us falls flat on his or her face.

As a community we need to do more to encourage our young people in their education.  Talk to them about making college a priority in their lives.  Talk to them about setting goals and working hard to achieve them.  I know that one of the reasons we came to this country is to provide a better life for our kids.   A good education is one way to get that good life.   The way I look at it is – I didn’t bring my family here to this land of opportunities so that my kids can work at minimum wage jobs for the rest of their lives.  We need to teach our children to reach higher, to dream bigger, and to go farther.

I know that we sometimes have to deal with stereotypes and ignorance on the part of other people that we come across.  I’ve come across it on many occasions.  When people I meet find out that I’m Samoan I can almost see the wheels in their minds turning and judging me by a stereotype of what they think a Samoan should be.  I enjoy proving their stereotypes wrong.    

As a Samoan woman I am proud of my heritage and take it personally when one or two bad apples give us a bad name.   On the other hand I feel like literally jumping up and down for joy when I read or hear about a Samoan that has done well.  E taunu’u ai le alagaupu fa’a Samoa, “ua fia Falealili fua” because even though I may not know them personally I am just as proud of their accomplishments as if I did.

The Good Life

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Today marked the anniversary of another year of my life.   As I reflect on my life thus far I have to say that for a girl from a small Samoan village who grew up with very limited means (relatively speaking) I’ve done okay.  I don’t mean to say that in a boastful way.  Rather, it is with a grateful heart that I say it.  Grateful because I know that I got here through the sacrifices of other people, mostly my parents.  Grateful because I know that I got here because of the values that I learned while growing up in Samoa.   Values such as hard work and perseverance.  Values such as a belief in myself.  Values such as a love for education.  Values such as love for family.  Values such as sharing what little we have with our aiga.  These and many others I learned growing up in Samoa.

 I’m sure most of us that grew up in Samoa can remember many occasions where we were sent to take a plate of food, an umu, to the neighboring families.   The extraordinary thing about this gesture is the fact that giving that plate of food to the neighbor probably means that your whole family now has to share even less of your dinner.  I remember being sent to give a plate of pork sausages for our neighbor.  I knew my mother had only fixed two  packages of sosisi to begin with so that was about 12 sausages.  I was now on my way with 4 of those sausages.  I think I salivated over those sausages all the way to the neighbor’s house and being more than a little mad that we had to share because that meant that we could only have one each.   More othen than not though when we take a plate of food like that we usually return with a plate of food from the neighbor as well. So we might not have gotten 2 sausages each but we did get a taste of whatever the neighbor was having for dinner plus a lesson on sharing that you just never forget no matter how far away from Samoa you are.  And I remember that food no matter what it was always tasted delicious. 

I remember as a young girl of 12 having to walk 5 miles to school and back.  I remember having to eat nothing but mago moko’s sometimes after school because there was nothing else to eat.  One of my hubby’s favorite snacks after school was popo and esi, again because that was all there was.  I remember looking with envy at some of the palagi kids in our school eat their peanut butter and jelly sandwiches for lunch.  School lunch?  An unheard of concept for many of us who grew up in Samoa. 

One of my dad’s favorite stories to tell me is how he carefully picked up and wrapped up a half eaten peanut butter sandwich a palagi kid had careless tossed so that he could give it to me later.  I was about 6 at the time.  According to him, I devoured it with a relish and I believe him completely.   What kid in Samoa had peanut butter in those days?  Let me correct that, what kid in Samoa has peanut butter at his or her whim even today? 

Samoa is not paradise as some would have you believe.  It is a real place with real people living real lives so it has its good and its bad.   However, taken all together it was a wonderful place to grow up.  I don’t think I would have nearly the appreciation I have for my life now if I had grown up somewhere else, say the U.S. or New Zealand for that matter.  I know I am appreciative of everything that has come my way because I grew up in Samoa.

 When I look at my kids growing up in the States I worry that they are becoming too selfish.  I worry that they don’t understand that to a Samoan sharing is the tamalii’s way.  I worry that they are too self absorbed, that they will not have the heart of a Samoan.  What I really want for them is to take the best of both worlds.  Ma’imau pe a ga mafai ona experience e tatou fanau nei ua ola a’e i Amerika ma Niu Sila po’o Ausitalia fo’i le olaga sa ola mai ai tatou i Samoa. 

Today as my husband spoiled and pampered me I am grateful that I do have such a man to share my life with.   Do you remember that line from the Sound of Music that goes “somewhere in my youth or childhood I must have done something good?”  Well, today as I reflect on my life up to this point I do feel that somewhere I must have done something good to be this blessed.   I am grateful to be here, I am grateful for my family, for my parents, for my husband and our boys, and I’m grateful I’m Samoan.